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Star Wars and fuck Disney

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Stormtrooper 08/23/2023 (Wed) 19:08:29 No.6805
we are so back
Star Wars: Ahsoka Episode 1 Reportedly on Track With Andor, Down 50% From Obi-Wan Kenobi https://archive.ph/igg6Y >This matches the 1.2 million who watched the critically-acclaimed Andor premiere in September 2022, is slightly lower than The Mandalorian's Season 3 premiere of 1.7 million in March 2023, and is down 50% from Obi-Wan Kenobi's 2.4 million in May 2022. >"Rosario Dawson’s portrayal of the Jedi shows that not only are fans eager for more adventures in the Star Wars universe, but that they’ll gladly watch shows led by female characters. With women serving as five of the six main characters, this opens a new chapter in the Star Wars saga." >but that they’ll gladly watch shows led by female characters. >mfw nobody watched andor and now nobody is watching ahsoka
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>>6834 I hate Disney, but this is a stretch. Only parts that looks the same are the central body's front grill and where the wings are attached, but those are both blatantly based on real fighter craft, which Star Wars space fighters always have been. The shape of the main body is totally different, the wing profile differs, the cockpit differs, the weapons differ, the tail differs. The real problem is how lazy the Disney design is. It's like the AK with so few bits added to it in Andor: The vismod is so minimal and half assed you don't even realize it's supposed to be a vismod protraying a blaster and not just an AK they stuck in by mistake. This is just a WW2 fighter plane with a few sci-fi bits stuck on and if not for the bits at the end of the wings (which not all of them have) and the upside down tail you could just call it "steampunk fighter plane". The random model did the idea better
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>droid says that sabine is shit HeH >ahsoka trained sabine before >never gave her the training helmet >Remember a new hope?! >Going to investigate this is stupid, don't waste resources >"Have you ever been in a war, senator?" What the fuck? >Hera's son appears, he looks like a mutt Well, at least they got something right. >Hera can't take her fleet to investigate someone stealing huge hyperspace drives >She doesn't go there by herself in the Ghost >She doesn't send a couple of squadron of x-wings Fucking why? >Why do you drop out of hyperspace so far from the planet? >Droid responds to his questions >She gets annoyed I hate sabine, I hope she dies.
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>See sabine is not a mary sue, she can't shoot the turret! >Ahsoka's ship survives the fighters and also the huge hyperspace ring, which conviniently doesn't have turrets on the back And the next scene is pretty damn retarded, instead of shooting the ship that is fucking huge, they decide to shot ahsoka that is fucking small, fucking why? Can you really block blaster fire from fucking ships with your light saber? >remember the space whales?
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And they know is a huge hyperspace ring, they needed to get fucking close to know that, kill me.
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>sabine if we can't get the map, we must destroy it OK? >but what about space alladin!? >Gee, I wonder what is going to happen? >Hera takes the ghost with a squadron of x-wings Finally, she is doing something right >She also takes her mutt son with her >mfw Why do they always do this? Every fucking time they write mothers doing retarded shit that puts their children in danger or abandon their children for the greater good, fucking why? Do they don't know that mothers have their children as top prioroty? A mother would never take his only son into the danger son, she would leave him in Home One, if they really wanted to have the mutt inside the Ghost, he should had got there and hide without Hera knowing, but no, they couldn't bother to do that, instead they add long ass scenes that do nothing for the story.
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Shitty lightsaber fights Sabine loses her helment, because you must see the actor face at all time. Ahsoka is dead or is she? Sabine doesn't destroy the map, surprising no one.
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>Hera gets to the big ass hyperspace ring location >Big ass hyperspace ring goes into hyperspace, destroying a couple of x-wings >Geee, she was lucky that the ghost didn't crash against some x-wings >I have a bad feeling about this I hope the mutt dies. >Ahsoka goes to the time traveling room, how? Fuck do I know, Anakin saved her, how did anakin got into the time traveling room? Fuck do I know. Fucking kill me.
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This Is the Way
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>>6853 This is the way that normalfags will see once again that Failony is a hack writer.
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>>6854 >>6853 just C.I.A. agent writer just hidden manipulate imaginative influence
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Too tired to shitpost about episodes, so here you go. It is shit.
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>>6859 Hayden deserved better than to be in this nostalgia pandering, filler laden shitshow.
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>>6863 I'm amazed how beyond retarded the writers are, if they want clone wars nostalgia to win over the normalfags, it is as easy as having Anakin appear as a force ghost to Ahsoka to have a wholesome scene of her knowing that Anakin was saved by Luke and bam you got all the normalfags in the bag, but what do they do? A shitty hallucination about Ahsoka confronting Anakin about something, winning the fight and then turning from Grey Ahsoka to White Ahsoka. Force ghosts, why don't they use them? Fuck, I wonder how are they going to kill Thrawn, last time he got kidnapped by space whales...
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>expectation >reality
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>>6864 Force ghost Anakin appearing to Ahsoka just raises even more questions about why he didn't appear to Luke or whatshisface before he went off the reservation. But then again they are normies, and normies are easily pleased by jingling keys. Thrawn will go out like a bitch, can't have the bad guy be competent or win after all.
>>6863 is there literally any single disney wars movie or show that isn't that?
>>6867 Star Wars Visions?
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>Thrawn is fat >night sisters had a kingdom in two galaxies >they don't pack up their bags and move the fuck out of the galaxy leaving behind all the idiots I hate that thrawn is fat, what the fuck, they ruined even more.
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>riding rancors? Lame!
Just saw a couple of vids on YouTube >Thraw is old >full of wrinkles >looks like an actor from HBO's Rome that they painted blue >irises >no calm, analytical, art obsessed guy vibes I want my EU back, look what they done to my blue boy...
>>6875 And I thought getting kidnapped by space whales was bad.
>>6876 It tunrs you into a space elon knock off with necromongers as henchmen on a forested SoCal planet. If there's a hell, that's probably it.
‘Ahsoka’ Premiere Viewership Numbers Worse Than ‘The Mandalorian’ Season 2 And ‘Obi-Wan Kenobi’ According To New Nielsen Numbers https://archive.ph/E4p48 >Nielsen reports that Ahsoka viewership clocked in at 829 million minutes viewed for the week of August 21 through August 27th, the week that Lucasfilm released the first two episodes of the series onto Disney+. >This is less than premieres for The Mandalorian Season 2 and Obi-Wan Kenobi. The Mandalorian Season 2 had a premiere of 1.030 billion minutes back in 2020. Of note, the premiere numbers only included the first episode “The Marshal” instead of two episodes like Ahsoka. >Obi-Wan Kenobi premiered with 958 million minutes back in May 2022. Like Ahsoka it included the first two episodes.
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Not even nu-Thrawn can save this shit show, nobody fucking died, none of the dark jedis died, not even one fucking turtle, just a bunch of stormtroopers and some not-samurais.
>"the emperor died?" >"That's what people say" Who the fuck writes this shit
>>6888 >"Somehow Palpatine returned."
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>>6888 (Checked) Normalfags that will lose their jobs to AI.
>>6888 Contrast The Truce at Bakura, which is held as a solid but unexceptional EU work where Leia is trying to get Bakura's governor to fold into the soon to be New Republic >"In the name of the emperor, welcome to Bakura." >She couldn't have hoped for a better opening than that protcol greeting. "Thank you for your weclome," she answered placidly. "You may think me terribly rude to correct your kind words, but it's no longer valid to welcome us in Emperor Palpatine's name. Emperor Palpatine died several days ago." >Nereus cocked a dark, heavy eyebrow and clasped his large hands behind him. "My dear Princess." He swaggered forward another step. "Have you come to Bakura spreading rumors and lies?" >"It gets better, Your Excellency. He was killed by his apprentice, Darth Vader." >"Vader." Nereus straightened several millimeters to loom over her. Disaste dripped through his pronunciation, a sentiment she understood perfectly. "Vader," he repeated. "His Imperial Majesty should never have trusted a Sith lord. I was prepared to disbelieve you, Your highness. But Vader as an assassin, I believe." >"Lord Vader is dead as well, Your Excellency." >Luke's chin rose at the edge of her vision. She knew what he wanted her to add. Maybe Vader had died heroically, but ten minutes' contrition did not make up for years of atrocities.
>>6885 Falony doesn't give a fuck about disney canon, Thrawn knew that Ahsoka's master was Anakin Skywalker, seems that it was mentioned in a book.
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Will sabine face the consequences of her actions? Will sabine use the force? Will you know what dark jedi is seeking? Will you know what are those things loading in the star destroyer? Will this show ever be good? That and more in this final Episode!
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>Run under a star destroyer's turbolaser fire >don't get hit The plot are is strong with Ahsoka. >failony remembers that this is spooky month, lets add zombie stormtroopers!
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>nice moves >she was training >what is your excuse? Jedi Alladin got his dick back, but not his balls. I'm actually surprised that Thraw is ordering around women, I'm shock. >Zombie Troopers forgot that they are zombies Bravo failony. >Death troopers are actually zombie troopers >Jedi Alladin forgets to use the force to force push them >Sabine uses the force for real this time, isn't she amazing!?
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>What happened to the minefield? >That was 4 episodes ago... 5 episodes ago! Who cares? >Thrawn escapes >Dark jedi apprentices is now breeding with the locals >Sabine and Ahsoka are now lost in another galaxy >Dark Jedi master is seeking the trio force gods something something, I find it hilarious that the daughter's statue doesn't look like the original, maybe because it would be problematic. >Hera and Jedi Alladin reunite in the most lame possible, hera whore actress can't shed a fucking tear, and there was a posibility of him getting his ship blown up in space or get shot in the hangar like a fucking retard THE END....? Did you rike it? Well this was a fucking mess, I don't know what is worse, this, kenobi or boba fett.
>>6912 I ain't watching that Assucka sheeit. Dunno why you guys torture yourselves with zogslop when there's shitloads of EU backlogs to do archaeology in.
>>6910 I'm not wasting my time with this shit show either way, but is all the combat as fucking awful as 5:15 on, or is that scene unusually bad?
>>6914 I can get why Star Wars embraces some aesthetic sword styles, but what were they thinking using reverse grip as a primary stance and in a duel? Emblematic of Yidsney running out of ideas?
>>6914 The fight choreography is pretty fucking bad throughout, its clear none of the actors save Hayden and Stevenson show any proficiency with a blade or training. Not helping is the whole volume thing which confides them to a single circular area.
>>6913 When I say something is shit, my family members would ask why? So it is my duty to watch shit and tell them. >>6914 >is all the combat as fucking awful as 5:15 on, or is that scene unusually bad? Yeah, the lightsaber combat is bad and slow, they didn't bother on hiring stun doubles to do good lightsaber combat. Hell, even the space combat is horrible, with the damn enemy ships not doing any kind of damage on the good guys ship, is specially bad and retarded.

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